Spiritual Gifts - The Presence and the Presents

The following comes from Small Group Dynamics, www.smallgroups.com:

"Now about the gifts of the Spirit, brothers and sisters, I do not want you to be uninformed. ... There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit distributes them. There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord. There are different kinds of working, but in all of them and in everyone it is the same God at work.” 1 Cor. 12:1, 4-6

When the conversation related to the Holy Spirit and the gifts of the Spirit, the Apostle Paul never seemed to lack for words. He wanted people to be informed about how God worked in and through his people.

If we want to talk about Spiritual gifts, we must first talk about the presence of the Spirit. If we jump straight to conversations about gifts, it would be like going to a Christmas celebration where there were only presents but no presence of the actual people offering the gifts.

All churches develop traditions, forms for doing church, which create a set pattern of how their gatherings work. Traditions are not necessarily evil, as we need them to help shape and define us as a people whose rhythms of life fit God's rhythms. However, the tradition that shaped the people of God more than any other in the Bible was the experience of the presence of God. During the times when God's people did not encounter God's presence, they were the least able to live according to God's rhythm of love. When I sit and read the story about the Church, my imagination is filled with the exhilarating ups and downs of encounters with God and others, not with church meetings and set agendas.

God wants a relationship with His people, not meetings. The Church is the people of God, not a people who happen to meet for gatherings to talk about God stuff. I think sometimes we go through the motions of church and forget the point of it all. It is as if we are going to school for the purpose of getting good grades and not to learn. In many cases we have grown so accustomed with the way we do church that if God did show up we would not know what it was.

The Spirit's Gifts

Sometimes I reflect on the New Testament and imagine what Paul might say to the church today, I wonder if he might say something like: "If you want to be used of God through spiritual gifts, then start experiencing God's Spirit together. The gifts are gifts of God's Spirit. They are not yours for the using as you will." Of course, our next question to Paul would be "How do you do this?" Then in my imagination I hear him responding, "What exactly do you mean? How else would you relate to God? ... You relate."

Even as I imagine this, I get frustrated with the vagueness in my own imagination. I want a how-to manual for encountering God's presence in a group. That is not how relationships work. We cannot put a formula to relationships. As soon as we make a relationship about principles or steps, we have turned the relationships into something that is not an encounter with the other person. God cannot be objectified this way. Relationships are about taking the risk of the give and take and the discovery of the other person as we make mistakes on the way.

We learn to relate on the road of relating, not in classroom. The same is true in our relationship with God. We just have to start relating to Him together in our groups, and from this, gifts of the Spirit will arise.

This may require a few changes in the way we typically do small groups in American churches.

1. Change the expectations. If people expect to gather around a Bible study or a DVD curriculum or even around social interaction, the presence of the Spirit will be minimal. If people expect to meet with God and trust Jesus' words: "Where two or three gather in my name, there I am also," then people will seek something different in the group's life even if they do not know how.

2. Shorten the Bible study to make room to wait on God together.

3. Take the risk of allowing silence during the meeting.

4. Vary the agenda from week to week.

5. Eat together. You might be surprised by this one, but I have found food as essential to connecting with one another and in inviting God's presence into our midst.

Encountering God's presence and experiencing the presents of the Holy Spirit go together. We know how to fill a meeting with answers to Bible study questions, singing songs, and even prayer requests, but these things we know how to do can stand in the way of relating to the God who speaks in a "still small voice." Unless we hear this voice and make room in our groups to encounter God, we will miss out on the power of spiritual gifts. God is big enough that He can still use us and move through us, but he has so much more for us.

Taken from Small Group Dynamics ezine article: "The Presence and the Presents," June, 2008, by Scott Boren.

When is a Small Group Just Another Meeting?

When Is a Small Group Just Another Meeting?
And what should you do about it?
by Sam O'Neal

(Editor's Note: While I don't agree with the criteria that Pastor Frazee used in forming his original group, that isn't the point of the story... read on! - Pastor Bill)

I'm going to attempt to paraphrase a story I heard at a small-groups conference a little over a year ago, so please bear with me. The conference was the 2007 Purpose-Driven Small Groups gala at Saddleback Church, and the speaker was Randy Frazee. The story centered on Frazee's first attempt at small-group ministry as the senior pastor of a large church in suburbs of Fort Worth, Texas.

Being the senior pastor, Frazee wanted to make sure that his small group was an example of excellence for the rest of the church to follow. So after much prayer and deliberation, he and his wife invited the most spiritual couple in the church to serve as co-leaders, and then the most athletic, most attractive, most intelligent, and most wealthy couples to round out the group. They called it their "Super Small Group."

The only problem was that the couples' homes were spread out over several miles, which meant that Frazee and his wife had to travel between 25 and 40 minutes each way to get to their group meeting every week. After a while, the added time (and added money spent on childcare) began to take its toll. Still, the Frazees persevered, and the Super Group settled into a regular and comfortable routine.

About this time, however, Frazee's new next-door neighbor—a real whiz at hospitality and socializing—began organizing regular get-togethers within the neighborhood. Soon, the little community was coming together at least once a week to play games, share food, chat, and pretty much experience a suburban version of Acts 2:42 (minus the selling of property, of course). Consequently, Frazee's Super Small Group became less and less appealing in light of what was happening in his own back yard.

He described one specific occasion when the next-door neighbor set up a street-wide potluck event. The evening of this event happened to coincide with the meeting time of the Super Small Group. Frazee described his sense of loss as he and his wife pulled out of their driveway and watched children playing kickball in the street, men playing horseshoes across a front lawn, families gathered together over steaming plates of fried chicken and cool glasses of lemonade, and so on. (As Frazee told the story, I got a picture in my mind of a penniless child looking through a candy-shop window, both hands pressed longingly against the glass, as several of his friends filled up bags and bags of sweet confections.)

Tough Questions
It was a great story, and I'm sure I haven't done it justice, here. But that was when I first began to ask myself the question: When does a small group become just another meeting? When does a community of spiritual friends devolve into just another obligation?

These questions were especially meaningful to me at the time, because my wife and I were experiencing a similar type of frustration with our own Super Small Group. Two things contributed to our aggravation: 1) We had recently moved 45 minutes away from our church to live with my wife's parents (and escape the high rental prices of suburban Chicago), and 2) Our infant son was becoming increasingly mobile, self-willed, and loud.

Week after week, Jess and I would rush through dinner and load up our minivan with bags of diapers, wipes, books, toys, and spare clothes. Then we would leave at 6 to make our stop-and-go trek toward the home of the group's host couple, my wife often scrambling to write down answers to the week's homework questions as I drove. Having arrived, one of us would begin mingling with the group, while the other took our son to a spare room to keep him occupied and (relatively) quiet. After an hour or so, we'd switch places.

Whew! Just writing this down brings back tough memories and emotions. It was a genuinely tough time for our family, and one unavoidable fact made things even more difficult: I was the group leader.

Tough Answers
What would you do in a situation like that? How would you handle being involved in a group that you genuinely loved, but was genuinely draining the life out of you and your family?

Jess and I decided that our best course of action was to leave. We waited until the summer, when our group naturally took a break for a couple months, and then informed the rest of the group about our plans. It was a difficult conversation, of course, and we still miss seeing everyone on a regular basis—we miss the community that had been built. But we know it was the right call.

That still leaves our original question unanswered, though. When does a small group cross the line between supportive community and draining obligation? Obviously, I don't advise people to skip out of their small group every time things get a little inconvenient or stressful. So how do you know when it's time to go?

There's no straight answer, of course. But there are some common symptoms I've observed in my own life, and in the lives of others. Here are a few of the main ones:

• You bring a negative attitude to the group. I would often pour out my frustrations to the rest of the group during our prayer and fellowship times. I wouldn't complain about the group situation, necessarily, but would instead gripe about my commute to work, our inability to purchase a home close to the church, our frustrations as new parents, etc. I knew things had gotten a little out of hand when my wife began to scold me after meetings for being "morose."



• You continually "misfire" in your responsibilities within the group. Things like forgetting to answer homework questions, not following through on promises to pray for people, forgetting to bring snacks, and so on are all signs that you are mentally and emotionally detached from the group, if not physically.



• You regularly fail to attend group meetings. This is physical detachment. If the group has become low enough on your priority list that you are unable to consistently attend, it's probably time to move on.



• You've identified a clear alternative. Like Randy Frazee and his neighbor's community gatherings, sometimes there is a specific activity or opportunity that you find yourself thinking about often. "If I didn't have to go to small group, I could … ." Now, I'm not talking about a television show you'd like to watch, or more time spent at work. I'm talking about a different way to slake your inborn need for community.



• You just know. Small groups are cyclical—they all have a pattern of birth, life, growth, decline, and death. The same thing is true for individual involvement in a small group, and sometimes you just know that the time has come to try something else.

In lieu of a conclusion, let me again emphasize that leaving a small group should not be your first response to difficulty, conflict, or any kind of stress within your group. It should not be your second response, or fifth. Any decision to walk away from a supportive community of Christians should be a last resort—a final option.

But sometimes we need to be reminded that it is an option. And if your small group has become something life-draining instead of life-giving, it's an option you may need to consider.

Copyright © 2008 by Christianity Today International.

Setting Faith on Fire - Year 3 Kickoff

Beginning this weekend we will begin publicizing events surrounding the beginning of the third year of our current capital campaign, Setting Faith on Fire. To coincide with our efforts from the pulpit, we are asking for your help in getting the word out to as many people as possible. Please stop by the office during the coming week and pick up a copy of a DVD that will be used to explain a key component of this year's stewardship emphasis. Then plan on showing it at the beginning of your next ShareGroup / Small Group gathering.

Thanks in advance from the Ministry Leadership Staff.

Pastor Bill

A Project for Your Group

If your ShareGroup is looking for something to do - a service project - take a look at this website: http://give2.ccci.org/featured/rdk-ct14/.

Saved to Share,

Pastor Bill

Have a Plan and Work Your Plan

In an open group, the leader needs to regularly cast vision to invite new people to come to the group. He or she can do this in a variety of ways:

Make sure you have a group covenant that includes the group’s purpose to grow and multiply.
In your prayer time make sure that you lead by example and pray for new people to come to the group.

As the leader, invite new people to the group on a regular basis.

Have an empty chair in the group circle to remind all group members that there is room in your group for new people.

Have a fun fellowship activity and invite some friends to join in with other group members.

Finally, follow Josh Hunt’s advice, “If you want your group to grow… don’t invite people to your group, invite them to your home for dinner.”

If a church is serious about reaching the lost for Christ and developing them for God’s glory, God will bless the church. Matthew 28:19-20 contains one command, three participles, and one promise. The command is to make disciples. The three participles are: “in your going”, “baptizing” and “teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you.” The promise is very simple and straightforward, “I will be with you.” If we keep a focus on reaching the lost for Christ, and do our best to develop them for the Kingdom, Christ has promised to be with us in our efforts.

Taken from Small Group Dynamics ezine article: "Assimilation - Have a Plan and Work Your Plan!," January, 2008, by Rod Dempsey.

Mission Opportunity for ShareGroups

I may be overly optimistic with what I'm about to share with you, but having just returned from a week in New Orleans I am excited about the many mission opportunities that exist in the Gulf region. Unlike most short-term mission trips, those to the Gulf are affordable and within easy travel distance. I encourage all ShareGroups to consider the possibility of going on a short term mission trip to this region of our country, where people are still recovering from the devastation of Hurricanes Katrina and Rita. Here is one such opportunity:

DATES: March 1 - 9, 2008
PLACE: Pass Christian, Mississippi
COST: $80 per person (that's REALLY cheap!)
THE MISSION: Sharing Christ's Word with developmentally disabled people and repair storm damaged homes.
SPONSORS: Voice of Care and Lutheran Church Charities
CONTACT: Deaconess Jana, Voice of Care, 630-231-3862, or email office@voiceofcare.org

More details on the trip are available on the NID website, specifically http://www.ni.lcms.org/forms/PRC/In%20Need%20of%20Volunteers%20March%201.doc

I promise you, if you have never been on a mission trip before, it will change your life. Please present this information to your ShareGroup for their consideration and prayer.

Saved to Share,

Pastor Bill

Missional ShareGroups

God blesses groups that look for ways to show His lost children the way home – He will make room if we make room (Luke 15:10, 22-24). He inspires new growth in us when we expand the relational circle of our group-life to touch the lives of others.

Sometimes people feel like the presence of newcomers will negatively affect the friendship-forming happening in their group. This is a myth. When a group takes a protective (territorial) posture when it comes to its size or acceptance of newcomers, it suffocates itself. A group needs to breathe. New participants feed a group’s dynamic like oxygen feeds fire. In other words, new participants bring new life. Consider this: There are a lot more options for dealing with challenges that come with growth than there are in dealing with the problems of decline.

Prayer ignites brainstorming about outreach. This is critical to do in the group and with the group. Small group leaders can bring options, but more importantly, they should involve everyone in the process of determining how the group can expand its circle of influence together. Take time to share the benefits of outreach, answer questions, and give everyone a part to play in organizing for how to engage in missions together.

The Lord will show your group how it can make a difference near and far. You might begin by thinking through what constitutes Jerusalem (local-citywide), Judea (citywide-regional), Samaria (statewide-countrywide), and the ends of the earth (countrywide-worldwide) for your group (Acts 1:8). What does each sphere look like and what opportunities exist within each? Ask the group to come up with examples for each sphere. I have found excellent ideas from www.servantevangelism.com: Ideas to Change the World (see also www.kindness.com or www.serve-others.com).

There are a variety of ways your group can reach out together:

Invitational – invite your friends to your group and your larger church.

Event-based – Link your group outreach to your church events and serve together during the weekend services or for special outreach events.

Community service – Identify needs in your community that touch your group’s heart and serve together (e.g. community clean-up day, providing school supplies for underprivileged kids, food delivery, helping the homeless, etc.).

Focused Prayer – adopt a people group in prayer (www.adoptapeople.com).

Mission trips – Contact a member of your church’s pastoral leadership team and share that your group would like to go on a mission trip together. Learn about what your church is already doing and get a couple of recommendations on organizations that can help with planning it.

Growth is a good thing. People naturally think of it as being a positive. Yet the road we need to travel to get there oftentimes feels very unnatural and even negative. However, when we overcome this internal resistance to step outside the safe boundaries of our groups we discover new passion and purpose in our lives and our groups.

Taken from Small Group Dynamics ezine article: "Missional Small Groups," November, 2007, by Reid Smith.